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I’ve put all of my love and attention into my Portland blog while this poor blog sits neglected and inert. I like this blog very much though. It’s pretty. And it’s mine, no sharing. I’ve been trying to write more lately, personal things and my stories. I woke up the other morning with a good story idea just floating inside my head. It’s nice when the lady muse drops in for a visit. Now I just need to summon the gumption to finish a story that I start.
The last few weeks I’ve been inundated with stressful situations. I don’t think I should get into all of those things now, but I’ll give you a list and you may also ask later for details:
1. The Car
2. Oregon Driver’s licenses
3. The Locksmith
4. The Tub
5. My Phone
6. Family stuff
7. Work
8. Future (Schools, GRE, writing…)
These things are all colliding and everything keeps going wrong. Every time I try to fix one of these situations, there’s a road block that stops me. My plate is piled high and I can’t get any of this stuff taken care of for one reason or another. It’s really making me feel sick. I hate being stressed out. I’ve felt frayed and at the end of my rope for a while now.
However, just when I thought I was going to explode from all this crap, I happened upon a beautiful sketch book on sale at Barnes and Noble. It’s blue with pretty birds on it. I decided that the book would be my outlet for all this noxious crap that has been mucking up my life. It has helped. When I need to vent, I open my book and write a few words about what I’m feeling or I sketch for a while until I feel less stressed. This blog hasn’t been my venting tool for a while, because I feel sad always making stressed-out posts. I’m thinking maybe I’ll try to post happy thoughts on this blog.
Yesterday my mom shared with me a quotation that she liked very much:
“‘Discipline’ is simply remembering what you really want.”
I like it very much too. I don’t think I’ve been very disciplined lately, and maybe that’s why things are going wrong. I’ve been trying to get myself back on track. Even with all this stress, I still want to feel at peace with my life, and that’s not easy. On a positive note, I think my vocab studies have been going very well. I’m going to take the GRE this fall and see how it goes. It’s scary. I’m scared. But I gotta push forward though all this crap and get something going.
